Archive for November, 2012

The 2012 Halloween Horror Movie Marathon Awards Ceremony

Posted in Uncategorized on November 7, 2012 by Justin T.

Halloween Mask

Good evening, freaks and ghouls! We have reached the end of the Justin’s Third Annual Halloween Horror Movie Marathon. I hope you had as much fun as I did!

This year we encountered Nazi-zombies, trolls, slithering alien bug creatures, ghosts, two demonic possessions, a mutant monster baby, a brood of mutant children, deranged inbred mountain men, insect creatures from another dimension, Dracula (twice, once in animated form), a shape-changing scientist, two crazed killers, a haunted dybbuk box, haunted Super 8 film, brooding werewolves (yuck), sparkling vampires (blechh), seemingly suicidal college kids, and the manifestations of the mind of a tormented artist.

Continue reading

Advertisements

‘The Twilight Saga: Eclipse’

Posted in Uncategorized on November 5, 2012 by Justin T.

Twilight: Eclipse

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010) Directed by David Slade. Starring Kristin Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner, Xavier Samuel, Billy Burke, Bryce Dallas Howard, Anna Kendrick, Dakota Fanning, Peter Facinelli, Ashley Greene, Jackson Rathbone.

Wait, what is this doing here? I guess, technically, this is a horror movie since there are vampires and werewolves. I didn’t pick it, I swear! My wife wanted to get in on the Marathon fun and Twilight is about the level of horror movie she prefers.

This is the story of Mopey Girl (Kristen Stewart) who hooks up with Mopey Vampire (Robert Pattinson) and they both seem to love how miserable the other one is. All they do together is talk about how mopey they are and how great it will be when she becomes Mopey Vampire Girl, cause, you know, to hell with Sheriff Dad (Billy Burke) cause he just ain’t mopey enough. Then there’s Shirtless Mopey Werewolf (Taylor Lautner) who thinks he’s the one for Mopey Girl, except he’s not because there’s no way Mopey Werewolf is the least bit mopier than Mopey Vampire. There’s some other Vampire Redhead (Bryce Dallas Howard) who holds a grudge against Mopey Girl so she turns some normal dude into Sneering Vampire (Xavier Samuel) to raise an army of new vampires, because apparently when you’ve just become a vampire that’s when you’re at your mopiest. And it all comes down to the Big Bad Battle of the Case of the Mondays. Anyway, I don’t know what I’m saying. This movie has made me ridiculous. Continue reading

Halloween Day!

Posted in Uncategorized on November 1, 2012 by Justin T.

All right, it’s Halloween day! I’ve taken the day off work and I’m going to try to cram in a bunch of horror films. In between, I’m going to go see my son’s Halloween parade at his school. Let’s get things started with one of the most recent faux-documentary demonic possession movies, The Devil Inside.

The Devil Inside

“I’ll tell you this, after all the years that I’ve been in the church, I’ve seen the devil way more than I’ve seen God. It’s just not the way it’s supposed to be.”

The Devil Inside (2012) Directed by William Brent Bell. Starring Fernanda Andrade, Simon Quarterman, Evan Helmuth, Suzan Crowley, Ionut Grama.

We’re not off to a great start with this one. The Devil Inside is a faux-documentary about a young woman, Isabella Rossi (Fernanda Andrade) whose mother, Maria (Suzan Crowley), has been held for years in an Italian mental hospital after having killed three people during the course of an exorcism that she was the subject of. Isabella travels to Italy to meet and reconnect with her mother. During the course of her visit she also talks with some students of an exorcism class. Two of them, Ben (Simon Quarterman) and David (Evan Helmuth), have been performing exorcisms on people the Vatican left behind, having decided they are not possessed. The two priests take an interest in Isabella’s situation and begin their own investigation to determine if Maria is possessed. Continue reading